Shingles! Age 22 months

Last week I was working away from home. Quite a long way from home. Like 4,295 miles away. It is always a bit weird being away from the girls but one morning last week I logged on to my computer and was met by this photo in an email from Mr. B. with a request for motherly advice.

My first reaction was "eek" then that changed to "urgh" and then I asked a few questions. Was Holly itchy? Was the skin raised? Was Holly showing any other signs of illness such as a temperature or sickness? The answers (delayed by email... obviously!) didn't ring any alarm bells so between us we decided to just keep an eye on the rash (OK.. a very remote eye for me) as it might just be a bad case of eczema; after all, her older sister has suffered quite badly with skin conditions over the years.

When I got home at the weekend I noticed that the rash was a LOT larger and was turning darker and feeling rough to the touch; but I still wasn't that worried. In fact, it was Holly's nursery who worried; they rang me at work on Monday morning to say that Holly would need to go to the Doctor for a diagnosis or else they wouldn't be able to accept her back at nursery. I managed to get an appointment within an hour. Sat in the Doctors waiting room for an hour (Holly was astonishingly well-behaved) and the Doctor diagnoses it instantly. He knew within about 2 seconds that Holly had Shingles.

For those who don't know, Shingles is caused by the same virus as Chicken Pox. Holly was unfortunate enough to contract Chicken Pox when she was just three weeks old so I had always been preparing myself for the possibility that the virus might become re-activated. The virus remains dormant in the nerves of your body after the pox have healed and re-exposure to the virus can cause Shingles to re-activate in the nerves.

Shingles commonly only infects one side of the body and appears in patterns that follow the line of a nerve - the most common of these being in a diagonal line along the shoulder blade and under the armpit.  It can affect other parts of the body and it sounds like it is most horrific when it affects the nerves around the eyes.

I think Holly has been VERY lucky that her spots have not been itchy or painful in any way. In fact, Holly has been as right as rain and seems quite proud of all the attention that her spots are getting. The only difference in her behaviour is that she has become REALLY clingy but that may just be because of me having been away for a while.

Because other people can catch Chicken Pox from someone with Shingles she was, understandably, not allowed back to nursery until the spots had all crusted over. Holly loves nursery and was frustrated to the stuck at home with us but the spots have now started to heal so she was back to normal today.

I think we're very lucky that this Shingles infection hasn't caused that much stress for us, now we just have to wait and see whether it has caused any permanent scarring.  Poor old Lara has a large mark on her face still where the worst of her Chicken Pox spots was.

When Does A Mummy Have Time To Be Ill?

Over the past month I have had a cold, then Mr. B. had a cold, then Lara got a horrid vomit virus which scared the hell out of us, followed by a horrendous cold. Finally, last week I caught the dreaded virus off her. It has been one thing after another.

In the olden days (pre-Lara), if I were ill, I'd take a day, maybe two, off work; curl up in bed and get myself better. These days I just can't do that. In the past year since returning to work after maternity leave, I have taken 1.5 days off work due to illness and another 0.5 due to Lara's illness. Even this makes me feel guilty.

But it's not the guilt or disappointment of missing work that bothers me, it is the fact that, even when I am so ill that I can't face a day in the office, I still have to be a mummy. There isn't any option not to be a mummy. You can't take a day off motherhood. So, at 7am I drag myself out of bed to get Lara up, dressed and fed before Mr. B. takes her to the childminder and then again in the evening I snuggle up with her on the sofa while Mr. B. makes the dinner.

Last week I was so ill that I simply couldn't do the snuggling bit. I couldn't get out of bed, and when I did (several times in the night to deal with a snotty daughter) I felt rough as... It is a helpless feeling of total inadequacy so I am thankful that I have a lovely, helpful husband who can take over, and some fabby parents who can step in too.

All this raises the question though, do you have the time to be ill?

Remaining Mellow About... Chicken Pox

My mellow state of mind has been tested again! On Friday, one of my childminders rang me to let me know that her daughter had been diagnosed with chicken pox. She gave me the weekend to think about whether or not I wanted to send Lara to her this week.

My first thoughts were for Lara. Should I be worried for her? What does it mean for her? My worrying was short-lived. She's a generally healthy child and we'll be there for her when she needs us. Chicken pox may be miserable for them, but in most cases, it is not a serious virus.

Then my mind turned to her other childminder – she's 5 months pregnant. I spoke to her that evening and she seemed remarkably mellow about it. Chicken pox during pregnancy can be very serious. Thankfully, she has already had the virus and has been given a blood test to ensure that she has developed immunity to it. It is still possible, as an adult with immunity, to develop shingles (a variation on the same virus) but this is rarely harmful during pregnancy. This settled my mind a lot as it meant that I would not be presented with a childcare void.

Finally, I worried about my husband. He's never had chicken pox and I've been warned that it can be a lot more unpleasant as an adult. In fact, I can still clearly remember seeing my own Dad when I was a child, he having been laid up in bed for a fortnight with the virus and having not shaved – the sight was the stuff of nightmares!

Anyway, I have decided to remain calm. Lara spends every afternoon with school children and every day with their younger siblings. She goes to playgroup, swimming lessons and family friends. Lara is going to get the virus sooner or later (in fact, 90% of UK adults will have had the virus as a child). In all likelihood, if she was going to catch the virus this time around, she has probably already caught it (the time taken from infection to the spots showing can be as much as three weeks, and it is most infectious a couple of days before and after the spots appear).

There is no way that her daddy is going to avoid infection either, without moving out for the next 9-10 years (!) it would be pretty much impossible for him to avoid it.

And so, I shall sit back and wait for the inevitable...